Awful Job...awful day

There's nothing worse than starting a new job when the first day is complete chaos. Right now I'm a production assistant on a reality show that is so unorganized. Just a week ago I was on the beach and drinking a corona yet now I feel like I just dove head first into hell. There is no order on this set. I'm being told 3 things to do at once all the time. One PA has already quit, leaving us down to 2 PA's. Is this what I have to do for money? Is this life in a nut shell? Must find a new life and a new career that isn't creating garbage like reality tv.

Seward, Alaska

When you make it to Alaska you must venture south to a town called Seward. This place looks right out of The Lord Of The Rings! Sky scraping mountains with snow covered tops, turbulant white caps unleashing on top of bright blue waters are just the first destination. About 10 miles north lies Exit Glacier, a sight you must behold. The surrounding area of the glacier is a forest in it's infancy, grayish rivers with black sand and quite possibly bear or moose.

It's in places like these where you are so inspired that the weight of the world vanishes. All those trivial worries are gone as you stand in a land carved by glaciers. It really puts things into perspective - I'm alive and right now everything is good. It makes you really forget about the rat race and all that pointless office drama. When it comes down to it, we are just animals who play games like status and success. Enjoy the real things in life.

On another note while at the glacier, I heard this 20 something tour guide talk to a family about her routine. She basically said that she wasn't sure what career to go after so in the meantime she was traveling and doing things she always wanted. I think it's a great thing to admit that you're lost. We are all lost. Embrace it and do things that you wouldn't normally do. I can't stand it when people are too proud to admit that they are lost. They are so obsessed with keeping that image that they will sacrifice their life in the attempt to impress others. It's all a waste of time. Don't stay in that job if it's solely for status. Everybody with that success 24/7 mindset is too self involved to care about your accomplishments.

When are you going to drop it all and buy that plane ticket?

Vacation time.

Someone was just telling me about a job offer. They were excited and said that you get a day and a half of vacation time every month. Oh goody! If I work for a year I can have off 18 days! Amazing!!! Wait a minute...18 days is barely enough to travel abroad on and I'm positive the job doesn't want you taking it all at once. After I said that I heard..."that's just how it is..."

Does it have to be? Is there a loop hole? As far a I'm concerned the only way to escape the system is to own your own business. 18 days off? That's the funniest thing I've heard all week. Life is short..18 out of 365 days a year is 4.9% of vacation time a year. Here is a sad statistic. If we were to work 40 more years that would equal 14,600 days. If we were to follow this "great" 4.9% vacation time plan we would have 720 days off. 720 days off adds up to just under 2 years. So you're telling me for every 40 years I work I get 2 years off? Hmmm...where do I sign up? If you can't sense the sarcasm I'm sorry.

Here's another sad stat. I've been out of a regular, consistent job for 6 months now. I'm still working but it's temporary jobs that last over a week or two. Here is the sad fact. Basically I've had off 182 days since the film job ended. That equals 10 years vacation time if I was at a job with 18 days off a year. Completely mental! So basically I've had more time off in 6 months than some poor guy will have in 10 years! Let me tell you that these last 6 months have been great but jeez this is what 10 years can accrue?

This is why it is so important to do what you love. All of the above doesn't matter if you love your job. The sad truth is that it's very possible that we will only have 5% of vacation time in our life. Don't be miserable for 95% of it. Even if the job you hate makes you tons of cash, it's not worth it. I've seen way too many of these 60 year olds burned out with this used up look on their face. It's a sad sight. They'll never get those 40 years back again. Some of them are too proud to show regret but the honest ones always say to me with this painful look "go to New Zealand..."

Adjusting to "The Real World"

Feeling lost? Maybe you just graduated school and don't know where to go from here. Maybe you lay in your bed at night thinking about the future. Don't sweat it because you aren't the only one. This is a stage in life. It's not a stage they tell you about though. The structure of life that we knew is gone. Think about it...ever since you can remember you have probably been in school where your main priority was to make good grades. You had people around you telling you to study. Your teachers gave you tests and graded you. Now that that's gone you feel lost.

It makes sense too. Think about this...you are so used to people teaching you, testing you and basically giving you attention. School = attention. Now that you're in the "real world" there is no one giving you attention outside of close ones. Jobs aren't going to test you...if you screw up you are gone. The real transition is getting used to not being the consumer anymore. You are the product now. That's the real world.

So this probably leads a lot of us twenty somethings to a stage of depression. We don't have anyone waiting on us anymore. I've noticed that a lot of people can't cope with it and decide to go back to college. I'm all for getting as much as an education as you can but make sure you're not staying in college to avoid becoming a product of this world. It's pretty much unavoidable but it's not a bad thing. It's another stage that we all will get through in time. The goal is to find something that you love that can sustain you. Be the product that you love and don't lose sleep over trying to figure it out. It will come to you. And always remember these "lost" times will be one of those things that we all will look back on and laugh at.

P.S. - If you have kids please don't give them a hard time when they are "lost" in their twenties. Remember when you were there too...and let them try living in New Zealand if they want...they'll find their way.

"Then What?"

"Then What?"

It's what I've been hearing since I've started telling people that I was going to move to New Zealand. It's almost comical now. Their responses might as well be in a robot voice...it's all the same.

Me - "I'm going to New Zealand."
Them - "Why?"
Me - "Why not?"
Them - "What are you going to do there?"
Me- "Travel around the country, work odd jobs and have a good time."
Them - "Then what? Then what are you going to do?"

I'm sure a lot of you have had this conversation before. I've had people tell me that I shouldn't go over there because I'd be "spinning my wheels". Spinning my wheels? What the hell are we doing at a job we hate for years and years? Making money for the future? Saving towards retirement? What we'd be saving for is something we can do right now. The problem is that our society wants us to rush into a career so fast that we never get the chance to figure out what we really want to do. There is a common fear for not having a plan. Ask anyone who's older and they'll say that things didn't go according to plan. I say embrace the fear and take your time. You can always make money...you might not always be free and have no commitments.

I try to remind myself that one day I'm going to die. It motivates me to do things that I might not do in my comfort zone. When people forget that they are mortal it makes it easier to settle in mediocrity and forget about dreams and passions. Think of dreams like you would another life. There are some dreams that can die pretty quickly. How about one like living in a foreign country? New Zealand's working holiday visa age limit is 30 years old. There are probably ways to get around this but what if you have a family, debt, job or a lease? It's pretty easy to kill that dream.

The next time someone says "then what?" just reply with the same question about their "plan". Then when they respond with their usual banter send them to this blog.

What are your dreams and are they living or dying?

Back story

So here is the gist...

I grew up outside of Washington, DC in a place called Fairfax. After high school I went to film school and then moved to Los Angeles to pursue film. I worked there for nearly 4 years and even had a film deal with a production company. The truth was that I was miserable working at this production company and was depressed that I had no free time anymore. Two day weekends year in and year out with the occasional week off. Two weeks of vacation a year is ridiculous and I never want to have that again.

So eventually the film fell through and so did the job at the production company. After that I literally had nothing. Everything I built had vanished and honestly I felt afraid but more surprisingly excited. My last day at work I left and went straight to the airport and flew to Sydney, Australia. I was there for nearly 3 weeks and had an incredible time. When I came back to Los Angeles I thought long and hard and decided that I couldn't waste the remaining 5 years of my 20's doing this. I packed all my stuff in my car and decided to drive across country back home to figure things out. My friend Peter, who was going through the exact same thing, decided to join me on the drive.

This is where this cross country documentary comes into play...

Gap Year: Cross Country Roadtrip from Brett Line on Vimeo.